Rise and fall of the bigfeet men

Rise and Fall of the Bigfeet Men, by Pfc Andrew Davis

In Flemish soil, there and then

Lay down a legion of bigfeet men

This ground their bones do consecrate

Where England’s might did concentrate

No retreat taken, no quarter offered, given

By bursting bombs, the ground was riven

‘Neath ambuscade of unicorn and titan

Fell score upon score of bigfeet men

Now merry poppies grow up through

Where Union Flag was carried true

With wistful hearts we remember when

Here fought and fell the bigfeet men

July 28th, 1917

Letter from Lieutenant Trevor Norditch, №52 Squadron “Spitting Sparrows” RFC (Royal Flying Corps) to Effie Browntrout

Dear Mrs. Browntrout,

I have the terrible duty to inform you of the death of your son Branwell. I was present when he fell at Verbrande Molen, in Flanders, Belgium, where he was leading the 2nd Olympian Saysquack in battle against Einhornwaffe and Titanium Giant units of the German Army. I am a pilot and I was providing air support to Branwell’s division that day. It was a fierce battle in which the enemy had us outgunned and overmatched with new battlefield machines that even make a Saysquack look tiny.

Take heart in the fact that your son did his duty to the last, fought bravely and died with valor, defending his unit from the onslaught that no one could stop. He was last seen alive in a shell hole with seven or eight Saysquacks in a desperate standoff against one of the Titanium Giant machines. His end was quick and painless. I am submitting my report of his actions to his commanding officer, that he might posthumously receive a Victoria Cross. God be with you.

Kindly,

Lt. Davis

Like what you’re reading? Subscribe to my newsletter: https://dashfire.substack.com/

Care to read a hilarious account of Theodore Roosevelt hunting Bigfoot? Find it here: https://www.amazon.com/Squabble-Titans-Recollections-Roosevelt-Rainforest/dp/B097X4R4LN