May 27th, 1917

Cable from American President Woodrow Wilson to United Kingdom Prime Minister David Lloyd George

It has come to my attention that a large fighting force of American Saysquacks have been requisitioned by the United Kingdom for use in combat operations. It is my intension to convey that…

TR and proposed members of the Rootin’ Tootin’ Bunch

May 15th, 1917

Cable from United Kingdom Prime Minister David Lloyd George to American President Woodrow Wilson

Mr. President,

I give you our sincere greetings and thank you once more for joining our war in progress. We think it’s an excellent war, and you’ll get along nicely in it. As…

April 14th, 1917

Letter from President Woodrow Wilson to United States Secretary of War Newton D. Baker

There are numerous reasons why we cannot allow Theodore Roosevelt to create a volunteer division and join the war and there are multiple facts that support this conclusion. First, he is not fit…

February 23rd , 1913

Letter from Count Franz von Blitzburg, to Emperor Franz Joseph I

Your Imperial and Royal Apostolic Majesty,

May it please you to know that certain discoveries have been made deep within the bowels of the Earth. These discoveries will likely sound fantastical and bizarre, but they…

April 13th, 1917

Diary of Major Horace S. Browntrout

Today is emblazoned in my memory forever.

It began with the sweet memory of taking my leave from Effie yesterday and returning to France for new orders. I was on my way to HQ to receive my orders when I saw…

J.B.S. Haldane, Monograph #23. A Summary Analysis of the Findings of the Unicorn Battlefield Specimen Retrieved from the Hejaz, Journal of Rare Vertebrate Species, Vauxhall University Institute of Zoological Research and Biological Sciences

The specimen we received bore proximate gross anatomical resemblance to the hoof and forehoof of species Equus…

I weighed the English army in my mind, and could not honestly assure myself of them. The men were often gallant fighters, but their generals often gave away in stupidity what they had gained in ignorance. — T.E. Lawrence, Seven Pillars of Wisdom

April 6th, 1917

Diary of Major Horace…

“Exceptions were the Austro-Hungarian detachments; and here, for the first time, I grew proud of the enemy who had killed my brothers. They were two thousand miles from home, without hope and without guides, in conditions mad enough to break the bravest nerves. Yet their sections held together, in firm…

April 1st, 1917

Diary of Captain Horace S. Browntrout

I was shaving when I heard a strange whistling sound, like a flute or pan pipes. In an instant it was at the top of the dune. Before Lawrence could yell “gas,” the creature had blown a blue plume of vapor…

Dash Fire Diaries

Envisioning a past that never was. Step through a surreal portal where objective truth, imagined history and satirical fiction coexist.

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